S&MHow well do the S&M principles of dominance, submission, sadism and masochism fit into our corporate models? You’d be surprised. Have you ever had a sadistic boss, or had to work with masochistic colleagues before?

Throughout my 30-year career, I’ve navigated and survived my share of corporate mergers, department shake-ups, political infighting, corporate misogynists, and office deadbeats. After decades of participatory observation, I noticed certain trends about supervisors and their subordinates:

Some of the best managers usually start out as:

  • exemplary
  • hardworking
  • devoted assistants learning from good mentoring

 Some of the worst managers usually begin as:

  • devious
  • sycophant assistants learning from “tor-mentoring.”

In other words, sadistic bosses—those who take delight in cruelty—create a sadistic management ethic. A study by the College of Business & Economics at the University of Delaware found that the quality of treatment between employee and supervisor, as well as social status, aggressiveness and gender, explains the prevalence of workplace deviance.

Madonna & Katy Perry I noticed, not surprisingly, that subordinates expect to be dominated to a certain degree. More interesting though, I found supervisors needed—and secretly craved—to be challenged. In addition, women seem to want to reconcile their authority and power in the workplace without sacrificing their femininity or individuality.

How Can Women Be More Effective on the Job?

A woman who can walk the line between hard business tactics and softer people skills breaks the office code and rises to the top. [Tweet this!]

These realizations forever changed the way view management as well as corporate America.

We all encounter stressful situations at work and how we handle them affects not only our professional effectiveness but also our own personal power and sense of self-esteem. Dominance training is a solution that will enhance your ability to be more effective on the job, using resilience and dynamism as your protective shield.

Dominance is based on the idea that by changing your actions, you can change your attitude and feelings. Let’s look at the striking differences between The Corporate Dominatrix©, The Corporate Masochist and The Corporate Sadist so you can understand the clear distinctions:

Corporate Sadomasochistic Personality Traits:

Corporate Dominatrix©

  • Clear boundaries; Doesn’t allow others to restrict or violate boundaries.
  • Conveys thoughts and opinions directly and clearly.
  • Expresses gratitude and appreciation graciously.
  • Direct eye contact, sturdy posture, assured gestures.

Corporate Masochist

  • Allows boundaries to be ignored, violated and regularly exploited.
  • Inept at expressing thoughts and beliefs firmly and honestly.
  • Seeks validation and permission regularly.
  • Shifty eye contact, sloppy posture, nervous gestures.

 Corporate Sadist

  • Invades others’ boundaries on a regular basis without remorse.
  • Expresses thoughts and actions in an overbearing, offensive way.
  • Belittles, marginalizes and diminishes.
  • Steely glares, finger wagging, fist pounding, aggressive mannerisms.

Dominance is standing up for your rights in an open, honest and direct way, which does not violate another person’s rights (remember the S&M credo: safe, sane and consensual). You have a responsibility to ask for what you want, make your feelings and opinions known and act in a manner that is worthy of respect.

Man & Woman Arguing Submissiveness is tactical compliance and appeasement; knowing when to back down or back off, while keeping your rights intact. I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t express your feelings or that you should constantly submit to another person’s needs or wants at your own expense.

Women with chainSadistic behavior is expressing feelings or stating wants in a manner that is dishonest, demeaning, patronizing, discourteous, or offensive. The focus is exclusively on the outcome, without considering anyone else’s opinion or asking permission. It may seduce you into thinking it’s effective at first, but it ultimately spells disaster for yourself and others.

Regardless of the behavior you run into, as The Corporate Dominatrix, you will be able to analyze every situation, determine the best course of action, break down barriers, and advance to the position you want! Learn about the different roles of The Corporate Dominatrix to make it happen.

Dommercise: How do you want to be managed or supervised? How do you manage or engage with people? Check out your command & control make up. Are you thick skinned or do you bruise easily in your interactions at work? If the color of your corporate personality is black and blue, or just blue, you need to re-evaluate your style. How long have you been meaning to express a few concerns to your boss, share new ideas or ask for more responsibilities? Maybe the time is NOW!

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